Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Better blogs

In lieu of any of my own posts, since I am quite possibly the very worst blogger whilst traveling in the world, you should head over to Cari's blog to check out her Sunday Snapshots, where I am at least present. Then click on every single link to every single blogger as they are indubitably better bloggers than I and probably have lots of other great stuff for you to read.

Happy Tuesday

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Mike Check: Baby Gender

I know I said that posting Mike's sayings would not be a recurring thing, and it probably shouldn't since I think it might be getting to his head- every time he says something even mildly amusing he points at me and yells "Mike check!".

However I thought I would make an exception just this once (and maybe again if he says something funny enough) to announce the gender of our third child.

While at dinner last week with my sister-in-law and her fiance, Mike announced the gender of the new baby to Hannah's fiance who she had not yet told, he said:

"Well it's either a girl, or a boy with labia"

We'll hope for girl.

Agatha Lucy Hahn, "Baby Lucy", due 10/25/2012

Why mornings sometimes suck

We've been blessed with a wonderfully spirited first born who, for the better part of her life, has awoken no later than 6 and probably for half of her life, has greeted us and her day even earlier.

I almost called this post "Sometimes I want to say the "F" word"but I thought it could cause scandal. But for real, there is little in the world that makes me want to yell expletives more than waking before the clock starts with a 6. I HATE waking up before 6. Strike that, I hate waking up before 8, but I will take 6 and hug and kiss it and give it flowers if I could get it.

Here is what my mental dialogue looks like when I have to wake up during the 5 o'clock hour, like I did this morning (mind you this is only in my head, and I do not condone the usage if this vulgar word):

Naomi is standing next to my bed, in my face, it is still dark out, I look at the clock, 5:10: "F"

She explains she is soaked and needs a new pullup, pants, and a new sheet: "F"

I fulfill all her needs, put her back in bed explaining that it is still "the middle of the night and she needs to go back to bed (lies), I lay back in my bed, the clock now says 5:23: "F"

I roll over at 5:40, I still haven't fallen back asleep. I even toy with the idea of getting up and cleaning and starting my day before the girls, I look at the clock again: "F it, I am just going to lay here"

I start to fall back asleep when I am awoken again by noises, I look at the door and there is light streaming in, there were no lights on before: "F, she's up again"

By this point it is past 6, I go out to find her under the dining room table, I tell her that she needs to lay back in bed until 7, that she hasn't gotten enough sleep so she complies. I go back to bed seriously hoping now that my intense fatigue resulting not only from the stupid early wake time and the fact that I did not go to sleep early enough to make this a good night sleep, but also from the fact that even even if I had gotten 8 hours of sleep and woken up at 7, I would be completely exhausted because I'm pregnant- please don't tell me all the energy will come back w a few weeks. It will not. It never does. I will be exhausted for the next 5 months and then many more after, that is the way this goes. I am not complaining, wait yes I am, but mostly I am just showcasing why many of my mornings are a prescription for bad words in my head. Also, I am not very pious. I mean, if I were, I would offer up these mornings much more readily for people who have real difficulties. I usually try to remember to do that, after I have shouted 27 expletives in my head.

While getting breakfast together and after getting yogurt on my hand "F", and spilling flour all over myself "F", I thought maybe I should put on some rap music in order to get myself motivated to get some stuff done in preparation for our trip, but then I figured that the only reason I even wanted to do that is because of the vocabulary already filling my head and that just maybe Ludacris and Jay-Z would most likely just exacerbate it.

So unless I can find some G rated Kanye, I will likely be listening to my rosary and chaplet on repeat for the rest of the day in reparation for being a terrible person.

*A note to the scandalized reader: the "F" words going through my head have never actually left my head and the letter "F" is often used internally in place of the actual foul word. My children have never heard this word, at least not from me.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Sweaty sweet summer

 Enjoying a nice 90 degree day here in the Bend,
 filled with several 20 minute outdoor spurts for the girls,
 (I am a little hyper paranoid about sun burn)
 And putting Mike to work on our dinner.

He worked hard on perfecting his grilled chicken today putting together a crazy brine to soak it in prior to grilling

I have to say that this was honestly the BEST chicken I have ever tasted in my entire life. Mike was pretty proud -rightly so- and showed it by asking me a few questions while eating, like: "Did you know that chicken could be juicy?" and "Is it possible that chicken can be too juicy?".

It may be the case I am notoriously the very worst cooker of chicken on the earth, it usually ends up being something like the consistency of a dog bone and all parties are chewing on it just about as long as a dog would a bone. This, on the other hand, had more flavor than I ever thought it was possible for chicken to have, and I am advertising for no one, except my culinary genius of a husband.

Maybe one day I will share is secret, but I must consult the master first.
Happy Sunday!

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Who wears short jorts?

Today's post is brought to you by:

  1. 17 week mountain bump
  2. Semi-immodest jorts. Thank you Motherhood
  3. Horizontal stripes not doing me any favors
  4. Fresh mom-bob hair cut now made even-ish with my scissors this a.m.
  5. Shoeless joe-mamma
And you have a lovely Saturday :)

Friday, May 18, 2012

7 quick takes: excitements and dreads

 I realize that this is all to similar to my "love/hates" edition of last week's quick takes, but I also realize that is doesn't matter, and that if there isn't some sort of logic to my quick takes I cannot participate in them as it makes me nervous and twitchy. So with this in mind, here are some things I am excited about in the coming weeks and some that I am dreading (in no particular order):

1) Super excited that I get to use my groupon that I bought for a pretty cheap hair cut and style this afternoon by MYSELF...
2) Dreading having it cut and styled by a man whose name I cannot pronounce and who was pretty awkward on the phone with me while I made the appointment, and I do not use awkward lightly here folks, he was super weird. And it was only a phone conversation. And the groupon is for a 45 minute cut, meaning there is no way I can get out of the awkwardness any faster than 45 minutes and it will probably go longer since he seemed like a BIT of a talker. Alright, I am done with this one.

3) Very excited for the upcoming nuptials of my sister-in-law to a fabulous guy next weekend. We leave Wed to begin the festivities and will return the next Wed after. Within this one I will say how stinkin excited I am that Hannah (said sister-in-law) will be living HERE in the Bend for their first year of marriage, always a fan of family in town and so excited to get to be around them during their newlywedship.
Hannah and Mike, because I could not easily find one of the 2 of us.

 4) Dreading 2 things about the upcoming event. 1) My matron-of-honor speech. Oh, did I not mention I am the MOH? Because I am. And there are something like 400 peeps coming to this thing. And I have nothing planned yet (don't freak Hannah, I am gonna nail it).
yeah, gonna nail it
5) and 2) (second part of 4, but I am not going to waste using up another quick take) Dreading that I realized this morning that I failed to mention to the seamstress at my dress fitting that I need some straps added to my dress. One week away from needing straps added and no one else but me knows that this needs to be done. No good. Again, don't freak out Hannah, I got it. I have about 7 plans in my head of how I will get some straps added to this dress. Seriously, I could have done a quick takes just about that, but I think that would have been lame.

6) EXCITED times 25 about the fact that Mike and I booked a hotel in this town in June (I will not tell you which weekend for fear that you will come and crash our party). My parents are coming to watch the girls for us so we can have a night away. By ourselves. I get a little short of breath with excitement just thinking about it.
7) As of late Bernadette has been just about the clingiest baby ever to toddle the earth. When I go from one room to another she weeps like I am being taken away for a life sentence never to see her face again. Therefore, I am dreading (just a little) leaving her for the night. I just don't want her to think that I have abandoned her and then have issues the rest of her life leading to undue angst and bitter feelings toward me for the rest of her life. That's all.

And so there you go, lot's so look forward to, a little to be scared of... man I had like 5 more I could have added, maybe I will do a sequel soon. But for now, go visit Jen and read some undoubtedly better quick takes here.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Children at play

Mike finished his last paper of his last year of course work for the rest of his life last night, or this morning, at around 3:30. YEEEHAW. This happened after a bed time of 4:30 the previous night working on the same said paper. His wifey (me), on the other hand, has been sporting wake times all too close to my husband's bed times due to a certain scary 3-year-old who, now that she can open her door, runs into my room at the ripe hour of 5:30 a.m. ready to start her day. Every. Single. Morning. Almost.

I am supposed to be napping right now while Mike gallivants all over town with both girls, but I couldn't sleep and my mother always said "when you can't sleep, blog". Lies, she probably still doesn't know quite what a blog is.

So as a result of the insanely early mornings, our morning play time often consist of something like this:

In case you can can't tell from at least a couple of these pictures, Bernadette is not actually tired since she sleeps until a reasonable hour of 7:30-ish as opposed to her wannabe nocturnal sister who is really completely exhausted:
I could write many tales of this difficult sleeper, but I will instead give you a little sneak peek at our babe in utero who was engaging in her/his own play time during an afternoon ultrasound (I don't know how much one can "play" inside a uterus)
The ultrasound tech put "yoga baby" on the top picture since the baby's foot is on top of the head (I love this tech, she is awesome)- so the baby was actually playing, sort of.

Also, we may or may not (MAY) have found out the gender of this baby today, but since this was only a 16 week ultrasound, I will hold off until the next one confirms what we pretty much know and then I will bust it out into the blogosphere.

I know you are all dying, literally dying to know, but I think you'll make it.

Friday, May 11, 2012

Love Hates

Joining Hallie over here for some quick takes and keeping Jen in my prayers today.

1) Hate: as recently mentioned my 3 year old figured out how to escape from her room which has been a source of much frustration and fear this past week and has generally been causing more sleep loss than my pregnant little big body can handle. Most nights it was sleep loss due to sheer fear of seeing her in the doorway with her blanket draped over her head like a ghost, which is her preferred way to exit the room. Great. I am working on the irrational fear.

2) Love: that last night was a vast improvement and found me waking this morning without being on the verge of tears because of how tired I was. Thank you over-the-counter sleep aid that made me too tired to think.

3) Hate: my new pregnancy diet. I think fat and happy is the way to be, but since I am sure my doctor will disagree, I will push through.
nasty and nasty's brother
4) Love: my recent reception if these:
from my sweet mother-in-law
and a starbucks gift card from my mom for mother's day. Best moms ever.

5) Hate: that while I began a super fun sewing project this week, my brand spanking new sewing machine is already not working. I JUST took it out of the box. Grrrr.

6) Love: that I figured out how to block my troll this week, thanks to all who helped me out on the old FB, always a faithful help in times of need.

7) Love/dislike (because it just didn't seem right to start and end with a hate): I am super duper excited that I can feel new baby nubbins moving all around, and there is ALOT of moving going on. This brings me to my dislike, which is that the kick boxing session was the only thing that actually kept me up last night despite my medicated efforts to sleep. It is worth it, for now.

That is all for now, have a splendid Friday!!

Wednesday, May 9, 2012


Yesterday marked some rather ground breaking things in a few different, sort of related, arenas.

1) I went to the doc for my 16 week appointment and found out that, since Christmas, I have already gained back HALF of the weight that I lost last year (if you read the post where I mentioned how much I lost you can do the math, if you didn't I will not divulge it now). Isn't that amazing!?!?! Personally, I am impressed with myself- also a little disgusted- but mostly impressed. If you read this post a while back you know about my preoccupation.

And back again. Bad lighting+awkward smile=typical ana pregnancy picture


2) I participated in the first form of exercise since being about 6 weeks pregnant- a 10 week break from working out and I went from having this as my daily workout routine 4 short months ago:
to barely being able to jog 1/4 mile. Also impressive.

Now I will give myself some credit here and say I had NEVER been that skinny/in shape ever in my life before, so I was bound to regress at some point AND I am actually ahead of the game in terms of where I was weight wise when I was pregnant with Bernadette- so I am feeling good.

But with all that said, I am beginning my pregnancy diet/workout regiment to attempt to not gain an average of 8 pounds every doctor's appointment. This plan really just means:
  • no more daily fast food, for every meal
  • no more mid-morning hot dog snacks
  • no more nightly reeses cups (sniff)
  • not more middle of the night confetti cake 
  • do anything at all by way of physical activity. I think I will try some of Dwija's tricks.
  • maybe try to eat every 3 hours instead of every 2
It's gonna be rough people, I am not gonna lie, but I think I can do it.

3) Unrelated, but watch out, I am sewing again.
And it is going to rock your world

4) And the last monumental thing that's been happening recently worth noting:
The girls are finally deciding to both smile for pictures together (yes that is a smile for Bernadette there) and it is making for some better pictures. 

Here's to changes on many fronts!

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Simon Says "Mike Check"?

As I'm sure all of you are already aware (at least you should be), the fabulous and indefatigable Grace, of the oft-linked Camp Patton, has a recurring feature in which she relates hilarious things her husband says (or texts). I'm not gonna lie: it's the bees knees, and I've always wanted to do something similar.

There are several problems with this idea though. First, I don't want to look like a copycat. Second, even if I could pull it off, I could never come up with a good name for the feature ("Simon Says"? brilliant. "Mike says"? laaaaaame). Oh yeah, and third, my husband doesn't say funny things. Don't get me wrong, he's amazing and wonderful in pretty much every other way, but he never seems to say things that are blog-post-worthy hilarious.

Ok, so maybe he does and it's just that I don't want to look like a copycat.

In any case, seeing as how my pregnant brain can't hold a thought, and how I hence can't seem to think of anything to blog about, I've decided after much prayerful discernment to post the following, as a humble, non-recurring homage...

Noticing me in my sweatpants in the early pm, with my computer in my lap and a pop-tart in my hand, Mike said, "I see you've got your snacking trousers on and that you've already gotten down to business."

After hearing me explain my concern over how Bernadette has been especially clingy and sad, he said, "I may have told her that we were returning her to K-Mart after the new baby arrives."

After (thankfully) spending the evening with me instead of working, he looked down at his watch and said, "Well, my paper should be done by now, I should pop down and see how it turned out."

During Bernadette's 17th tantrum of the day, Mike picked her up and said, "You're turning into a real disappointment."

Responding to Naomi's demand to know where mommy was (for probably the 47th time), he said, "Toledo, and she might not come back." (I was in the kitchen.)

While dealing with something akin to Pearl Harbor the other day (really just the girls melting down), I yelled downstairs to Mike for some help. When he got upstairs, he said with a smile, "I have a servant's heart and a fresh spanking hand."

In discussing a possible upcoming giveaway on the blog, I said to Mike that "everyone wants a free nursing cover!" Mike said, "Not me. Well, actually..."

Friday, May 4, 2012

7 quick takes: Awkward baby comments edition

Yesterday I took my 2 sweet girls for a walk to take some "new" neighbors a house warming-ish gift of banana bread (they have been in the neighborhood for many many months now and I am just getting around to this) I am a regular Mister Rogers.

Anyways, on my little jaunt we ran into my sweet elderly old lady neighbor and stopped to talk for bit during which time it came out that several of the new families in the neighborhood have at least a couple small children- this fact greatly excited me as the general population of our neighborhood is currently of the same elderly make-up as this said woman. Our sweet neighbor expressed that she too was happy that there would be "more children" in the neighborhood, at which point she asked the ages of our girls. I said "3, 18 months, and we have another on the way!" (excitedly with big smile) and she responded "Oh, Ok". That was it. Her general happiness at the thought of more children faded almost immediately with my little announcement. Maybe she pictured in that moment our whole street crawling with babies: babies on her roof and in her vegetable garden, babies coming our of her heating vents, I don't know. I am inclined to think that we just crossed the line with our whole "were gonna break the rules and have more than 2 kids" attitude.

Anywho, this was the first reaction of this nature I've gotten since conceiving this babe and I fully expect to have many, many more like it in the next 5 1/2 months.
Here are some others I think we'll encounter (way more exciting than, "Oh, Ok"- she could have done better than that)

1) "You're done, right?" (not even "are you done?" this person feels the need to really impose what you should be doing first, then double check, "right?")

2) "How many kids are you going to have?" (I always picture a teenage, air head asking this question, as if there is actually an answer)

3) "You know what causes that, right?" (This one deserves as awkward as a response as you can think of, since it is the MOST awkward question anyone could ever ask)

4) "You're a baby making machine" (A friend just told me she got this response, I can't quite think of what is going through the person's head who says this)

5) The immediate defensive remark like "We're waiting", or "we waited" or the explanations of how they are done and have been sterilized (this puts you in a really weird position, but it is at least a conversation starter, unlike the rest of them)

6) "You're going to have your hands full" (why yes I am)

7) "Why?" (again, at least a conversation starter)

Let me know if you've gotten other responses so I can prepare myself for them, also if you have any good responses, I'd love to hear them!

For more quick-type takes, visit Jen and many others at Conversion Diary.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Sometimes your kids scare you

I have been living in a temporary dream world for the last 6 or so months.
Soon after Naomi was put into, and then figured out how to get out of, her normal bed, attempts were made and made successfully to keep her bound to her toddler cage of a room. I am not one of those sweet mothers who willingly invites my children into my room (let alone my bed) in the night time/wee morning hours. Once their allotted time spent there for the first few months of life is up I am all too eager to get the little out and into her own room, since by this time she is generally beginning to disrupt the peace and harmony that is sleep time for myself and Mike.

So as soon as Naomi decided that staying in her room after bed time or during nap time was not an option for her, a battle of wills began and was won (only temporarily) by myself (and Mike, but really I credit myself for the strategy). After some serious prodding, I finally got Mike to give in and let me put a child proof door knob cover over the knob on the inside of her room and BAM, I won, just like that.

She only cried a little and fell asleep on the floor next to the door every night for only a few months. But we slept, and she slept. And nobody (nobody being ME) was awakened with every noise in the middle of the night waiting for a creeping 2-year-old to be standing in the door way, or at your feet, or in your face looking something like this:
Seriously, it freaks me out when a kid is standing in my room and I didn't know they were there. I indulged in the gratuitous watching of one too many horror films during my high school and college days and the remnants of these videos still made themselves known during these night time appearances of the Nomes.

So the dreaded moment came last night when, after she was put in her room for the night, it happened. The door opened. I asked Mike immediately if he took the cover off of the door since he had done that one night to see what would happen, of course that night Naomi was found under the dining room table shortly after bed time. The cover was promptly put back on. But he answered "no" and the reality set in that she had figured it out. The contraption is not complicated, you just have to squeeze the door knob in the 2 holes on the sides of the thing and turn, but I had hoped against hope that she would never figure this out.

So this morning when my bladder woke me up at the ripe hour of 5:40, I laid back down to try to finagle another hour of sleep before the awakening, and unsuccessful was I. At every single little noise I was convinced that she was opening the door, so I would hop up to try get to her room before she got into our room (to avoid appearances like the above image, of course!) And because of my irrational fears, an hour of sleep was lost and little angel Naomi did not open the door until her reasonable 7 a.m. wake time.

You win, Naomi, you always do.