Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Happy Halloween

Our family is the only family that I know personally who does not celebrate Halloween, though I don't get out much, so there are probably way more than I know.

I did celebrate it as a child, Mike did not. Our own little family has never celebrated it and this is the first year since starting our family that I am totally ok with it, it only took 9 years. I've gotten questions in the past about why we don't celebrate it but never wanted to join the discussion before (it can get heated and I am pretty non-confrontational) but between the peace I finally feel about it and the lack of any other blog content circulating in my brain currently, I am just going for it.

I wasn't suckered into not celebrating Halloween by my husband, I was pretty much on board 100% from the beginning, primarily because I was exposed to a lot of weird, inappropriate stuff as a young person as a result of Halloween done wrong and me being in the wrong place at the wrong time. But that is not why our family doesn't do it.

We don't celebrate it because we want the focus of all celebratory activities to be centered on and revolving around one of the greatest feast days in the Church (and one of the only Holy Days of obligation in the liturgical year) All Saints' Day.
Baby Naomi Therese as Saint Therese, the best yet.

Now please know that me saying this is not insinuating in any way that YOU aren't focusing enough on All Saints' Day. I promise with all my heart that I am not saying that. But I know myself and I know my limitations all too well and I know that if our family participated in the many festivities available surrounding Halloween, I would be deplete of all necessary energies required to play up yet another celebration the very next day. It's a lot, and I don't have it in me. So we stick to All Saints' day.

I really do love that when we get into October, the thing my girls start whispering about at night is the saints they will chose to dress up as on All Saints' day. I love that they deliberately sit down and read saint books to find out about super obscure saints to be in order to really throw people off (Bernadette was Saint Mildred 2 years ago and Naomi will be Saint Agnes OF ASSISI this year-- didn't even know she existed until today).

I spent the last 5 years or so approaching Halloween with dread and not even because of the kids, but because of how I dealt with it all in my head and heart. At first I felt guilty for depriving my kids of all the fun, then that morphed into feelings of bitterness that Halloween even needed to exist. I've gotten defensive in the past and had a hard time looking through various Halloween costume pictures on social media. But not this year, praise the Lord.

I am so thankful for this year because it is the first year that I finally just do not care, I'm happy about what we do and happy about what everyone else does. I don't care if my kids are a little "deprived", because I know they are not. We do a ton for All Saints' day and they are used to the way things are for us, plus we thoroughly enjoy viewing all the fun Halloween displays in stores and in our neighborhood (with the exception of the utterly inappropriate corpse in the yard down the street). We love looking at all the adorable pictures of friends and family and their cute costumes, and all the feelings of defensiveness have vanished.

I am totally clueless as to where this peace has suddenly come from, but I'm so happy about it. It's possible that I have just grown up a little bit and realized that there are so many bigger, more important things to dwell on than Halloween, but I'm not going so far as to call myself a grown up. Not yet.

Regardless, a happy Halloween to all of your families and a very blessed and happy All Saints' day tomorrow!


  1. Ana I'm glad you posted. I grew up mostly not doing Halloween (we did when I was very young but from when I was about 8 on we only did All Saints) and it left me with many awesome memories and friends. Now we do Halloween with our kids because it seems easier (there's no All Saints day parties I know of and I'm not up for planning it all myself yet, oldest(of 4) is 5) but I really don't love Halloween and to do something else (as long as it involves lots of candy) is perfectly fine by me. Plus every costume here has to fit over a snow suit so all the magic of a princess dress of tutu is pretty much lost in the toques and mitts.

  2. I would love to know what you do/say if kids come knocking on the door on Halloween. Do you not answer? Do you go somewhere so you're not home? Just wondering - love this post!

  3. I can't stand Halloween. I totally support other people doing it, but I am soooo not crafty and my kids have food allergies and 2 days in a row of parties and costumes and collecting candy in order to give it away just feels like work to me! I'm the worst.

  4. I really appreciate this post. Part of me wishes that we had done what you do from the beginning. Our oldest are now six and I fear it's too late to "quit Halloween," but your post is inspiring me to focus on making All Saints Day THE main event. Thank you.

  5. We don't celebrate Halloween either (my husband is esp against it) but I do like to decorate for fall with pumpkins (and carve them) and we also have decided to participate in Trick or Treat as part of our All Saints Day celebration (is that cheating?? lol).