Thursday, March 20, 2014

to blog, or not to blog?

I was sitting with a friend yesterday while our kids romped and frolicked enjoying a rare play date and the subject of my blog came up. I mentioned how little I post anymore and how I just don't want to do it and want to stop all together. As I said it some really sappy and overly dramatic music could have been playing in the background. I mean really, who really cares? It's a blog, so what if I never post again? Everyone will be fine and happy and the world will continue to spin, and most likely some people will even be happier (I know I can be annoying).

So since giving gratuitous explanations of things nobody asked or cares about is my shtick, here are a few scattered reasons why I might just keep the blog. When I think back on all the years of being married, the ones that I have the hardest time remembering vividly are those that I didn't blog during. I cannot remember my entire pregnancy with Bernadette, (except for the last few weeks where I knew she was breech and was trying to flip her, because that was too dramatic to forget) and the only reason I remember any of my pregnancy with Naomi is that I wrote a lot of it down. Most of her baby-hood is completely gone from my memory, I should have blogged it!

It's not that I think I need this online diary to document every detail of my children's lives, in fact Naomi turns 5 in a few days and she will be entirely retired from this blog in order to protect her privacy and possible future hatred of me for sharing things that could embarrass her later on. So I won't be e-logging her every home schooling milestone and the funny things she says will no longer be included in Too Much Talking and that's ok, I am sure I can remember how to use a pen and paper and log them elsewhere.

I don't think I remember the first few years of marriage and family less because I didn't write details down, although that is certainly part of it. But I think there is something about blogging and writing and having a creative outlet that has sharpened my brain a little and, in the tiniest way, helped to reverse the memory-less doom that is a woman's brain after pregnancies. Maybe, I don't know. It is really helpful to use the archives for reference when I totally forget something, and it has been the source of winning at least a few arguments with Mike about how things really went down.

Where am I going with this? I actually have no idea. I have been hiding from Lucy for about 20 minutes now because every time she sees me she begins weeping, but if I am out of sight she is happy as ever- lamest. thing. ever.
                      ^ 80's turtle necks for the win!!!

And I cut about 5 inches off of Naomi's hair yesterday and every time I look at her I want to start sobbing like Lucy when she sees me because: where the heck did the time go?!? She looks like a mini-adult and acts like one too and I just cannot believe she will be 5 in 3 days. Time needs to stop right now.

Then there is the miracle that is Bernadette and the huge change that has taken place in the past week after many, many weeks of rabid, wild, insane tantrums that left me and Mike totally stumped and wondering if we're really qualified to be parents at all (not really). She is back to her super sweet, still feisty but mostly hilarious self and we are feeling a little less like total parental failures.

Back to the original point: I am not going to stop blogging. I really do love it somewhere deep down, I don't do it for the pennies I make on affiliate links, it's not a job, it is and always has been a little hobby that I like.

For right now I will continue to play the blame game using the plague of pregnancy insomnia and the winter that never ends as my main excuses for blog neglect. Sleep deprivation puts a cloud darker than the perma-cloud in South Bend over my whole life and I probably don't even really feel negatively about blogging, just tired from not sleeping.

Happy Thursday, party people! 


15 comments :

  1. I call this Blogging-while-pregnant-itis. But don't stop, you'll hit your stride again. You're probably just exausted, like anyone would be...:)

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  2. I completely understand where you are coming from. Not that long ago I was in the same place. I was just tired. Mentally and emotionally just exhausted. For me it was one day like I woke up and a flip switched off and I felt done. I wrote and rewrote my farewell post in my mind a bazillion times, but never wrote it in Blogville. While I felt like I didn't care or have the gumption to write because perhaps no one else really missed me either, I was afraid of the piece of me and the enjoyment I get from blogging that would be lost. One day, several months later, I was finally ready to come back but with no attachments. No schedule, no routine, no obligations. For me that was helpful to jump back in without my own or others' expectations. Sure, my blog isn't what it maybe once was but I sure do enjoy reading back at those posts from several years back. Like you, they have become the place to go to when this mommy brain has forgotten even the simplest moments.
    Blessings as you move forward in whatever way is best for you and for your blog.

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  3. 1. I think most bloggers go through this. I just hope that if you do decide to ever stop (don't) that you will keep me in the loop of all things Hahn.
    2. How did you come to the decision to stop blogging about your kids at 5? Super interesting idea.

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  4. Don't quit! We'd miss you :)

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  5. I really enjoy your blog, so I hope you don't stop blogging, but I completely understand the desire to do so.

    And, interesting about not mentioning Naomi after age 4. I hope you don't mind if I share, but I wrote a post on how to respect children while using social media that you might find interesting. http://onecatholicmama.blogspot.com/2014/01/how-to-respect-your-children-while.html

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  6. 80s turtleneck for the win. With lines like that, you cannot stop blogging.

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  7. I found that 5 was a pretty natural time to really scale back on the amount of blogging I did about my oldest, too. She's still around but I'm really trying to guard her a bit more, for her sake.

    Also, a little while ago I learned that as long as I kept in mind why I was blogging it was easy for me to do it or to walk away for a little bit and feel no blogger guilt. Because who needs blogger guilt?

    But I hope you don't stop blogging. :)

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  8. I go through the same phases of not wanting to blog anymore... But looking back at old posts I'm so glad that I've been doing it for a while because YES, I forget EVERYTHING and I love reading funny things the kids have said and looking at old pictures :)

    I'm also interested in the age 5 rule, just because we're nearing the same age, but I don't feel the same compulsion to remove John Paul from my blog entirely. But I HAVE noticed that mention of him has been tapering off as he gets older, so maybe some day he'll be less of a blog presence? The funny thing is, he LOVES for me to take pictures of him and write things about him - maybe I'll just keep writing and then make old posts private if they might embarrass him?

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  9. I have to admit, your blog is one of my faves and I do a mental happy dance whenI see the Facebook update post! Your posts make me laugh, make me nod my head in complete understanding and think "oh yeah, I know what you mean". It's all good!

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  10. I got rid of my blog because my 7 year old daughter is old enough to read and she asked, are you going to post this on your blog, when I took a photo. JEn at Conversion Diary seems to do an awesome job at bloggin with out giving too much info about her children. I think moms with very little kids blog the most, and as you kids get older, you just don't have as much time and you also start weighing the privacy. I personally love your blog. But I totally understand your blog dilemmas.. It's such a fun community, the Catholic Blog-o-sphere!

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  11. If you stop blogging, I'm gonna be pissed.

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  12. I love your blog but I completely understand! The way I see it it is a fun creative outlet for when I have the time and I want too! If you don't enjoy it don't do it but if you genuinely do and you just need a break then come back to it! :) I hope you do....

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  13. Tell Naomi that I love her haircut, but it definitely does make her look older.

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  14. I'm going to miss reading about Naomi! Why the age of 5? Just wondering, since I don't blog....!

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  15. I shan't let you quit. I'd hound your inbox and I'm annoying.

    It's helped me to stop expecting too much of my blogging self. Not that I was ever prolific - or, at least prolific in quality content - but I liked my 3x a week gig and now it's like..3x a month. I've made my peace with it. I write when I can. I love your posts always, but if it's between cutting back or QUITTING !!! The former, por favor.

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