7 quick takes: confinement edition

Thank you, Jen, for providing me an opportunity to have my whiny voice heard, yet again, in link up fashion. I am very pregnant.
Here it goes:

1) I am of the opinion that all women in the late stages of pregnancy deserve to have a period of confinement. They used to do that back in the day right? I know they mention in Little Women (the Hollywood rendition, of course). But seriously, I have pretty much decided that I am going into confinement and am all but cutting myself off from society, for society's sake, until this baby makes an appearance. I went ahead and walked out on the porch yesterday and yelled as loudly as I could "I DECLARE CONFINEMENT!!" Our neighbors looked super confused, but also oddly peaceful, and they still waved and nodded, so I took that as all the validation I need. I am out.

2) You see, I am not one of those pregnant women whose "shirts still fit them when they still have 5 more weeks til their due date", or one who "doesn't sweat profusely when she walks up the lone step from the play room into the kitchen". Nor am I the type who can "hold her bladder stream when 5 pounds of baby and even more of uterus and placenta are weighing down on it and who won't just pee her pants right there in the store" or the type who "chooses to offer discomforts up instead of complain about them". Honestly you could insert most of what Chris Farley says in the below video into my scare quotes and they could apply to me. So it is for the good of everyone that I go away.



3) I have completed most of the tasks one is supposed to complete before a baby arrives, and now that the adorable bassinet is all assembled and mocking me night and day, I have nothing left to do but birth.

4) Therefore "Operation Get The Baby Out" has already commenced. All that it means currently is loading up on some good old fashion Evening Primrose oil, which is super gentle and probably doesn't do anything anyways, but it makes me feel good about myself and my cervix. But rest assured that the moment I am "full term" every natural induction method that is safe/not harsh/obviously non-invasive will be put into practice. It may be that none of them work, but no one, and I mean no one will be able to say I didn't give it my all.

5) I feel really good about it, because they baby has sent me lots of casual, even subliminal messages that she is good and ready to come out. That is, if by subliminal messages you mean kicking my side so hard that I had to check to make sure she hadn't escaped.

6) I will spare you one.

7) To end on a happy note, a special package came in the mail yesterday to cheer me from all my "I do not want to move from any of my various perches around the house but these children need someone to care for them but I don't want to plop them in front the TV for that many hours" blues:

An awesome complete collection of vintage Disney books on tape discovered on ebay for a serious steal of a deal.

 Happiness abounds and I can continue my confinement from the comfort of my couch.

Click for more.

Another birth story

As I approach the second birthday of my second-born, as well as the impending birth of our third baby, I have been thinking a ton about birthing. Plus, my fellow pregnant (not anymore) sister-in-law gave birth two days ago, and everyone in the world seems to be having babies, so it is all I think about. I've now had two very different experiences and am all too interested to see how this one turns out.

I thought maaaybe I would spare you a long, rambling pregnancy- and birth-related novela. But then I decided not to.

Therefore this will double as Bernadette's early birthday birth story, since I did the same for her sister, and I wouldn't want to induce undo jealousy (I just know they are logging the number of blog posts I do about each). And it'll also be a reflection on having a c-section versus having a completely natural birth.

YAY for birth stories!

Wee baby B during the first day of her life; and the only picture I have with me in it the days leading up to and following her birth. That is my arm that is holding her.

---

Everything was looking good regarding Benadette's arrival during my pregnancy with her, other than my crushing fears of doing another natural, epidural-free birth-- I was a bit traumatized from the pain of Naomi's birth, although I loved loved loved the recovery time of 5 minutes. I had taken a Bradley class when I was expecting Naomi and after learning all about the evils of epidurals, c-sections, and over-medicalized births, I was pretty stuck as to whether I should go all natural in a tub again and feel every single ounce of pain, or give myself a little break with some epidural action. Little did I know that in the end I would have no choice (cue overly-dramatic background music).

Around 34-ish weeks, I found out that Bernadette was breech. No biggy, right? Plenty of time to flip her, right? Sure, for lots of other women, but I have never seen a more stubborn still-gestating baby. We tried the external cephalic version at 35 weeks-- you know, where they basically attack your stomach with sheer arm force and smash and push on the baby until her heart rate starts to plummet and then they take a little break until it goes back up and then they smash and push some more. First one doctor tried, and then he had to call another doctor in to pull on one side of stomach while he pushed on the other side. Did I mention they gave me nothing for that pain? Well, they didn't, and it pretty much felt like they were going to rip my already stretched abdominal muscles in half during the procedure.

And then it didn't even work. One of the doctors, the less sensitive one, said something like "Well, sorry it didn't work. We need to schedule your c-section now." Then I started to weep, and she quickly realized that this was my one of my greatest fears when it comes to child birth, second only to dying of course. I am sure it was so routine to her that she had no idea why the thought of this would bring me to tears. The other doctor was much more sensitive and supportive of us "all-natural" types, so we decided not to schedule the c-section just yet, so I could try to flip the baby on my own using more natural, gentler methods.

Long story short (not really), none of those methods worked: frozen peas on the top of my belly while hanging upside down off the couch, standing on my head in the pool, chiropractor visits, pushing pressure points, swimming, laying on a blanket and having Mike lift the blanket at my waist and shake the heck out of it to "loosen the pelvic bones" or something. So ridiculous. That is how I spent the last few weeks of my pregnancy with Bernadette- all to no avail since she would. not. turn.

I talked to the more sensitive doctor about the option of trying to deliver her breech since he had been in practice for like 60 years and delivered breech babies successfully. Although it was definitely not allowed, he slyly told me that if I labored until I was 9 cm at home and came in ready to push, he would just go ahead and try to pull her out.  Something about this option sounded a little shaky to me, so I decided not to go that route. Then that doctor left the country anyways for a little Roman holiday, so I had to be with the other, less-than-sensitive-but-still-very-competent doctor.

So we scheduled a day for the doom that was the c-section and I cannot tell you how scared I was. I cried soooooo much. I called my good friend who had had one to see if she could put me at ease a bit, and that is just what she did. It was amazing. She said things like, "It's not that bad," "It's no big deal," and "You still have your baby in the end." And how right she was.

I was 39 weeks when we went to the hospital to have Bernadette, and it was a Sunday-- I guess they don't usually do c-sections, unless they are emergencies, on Sundays. However, the doctor who was previously insensitive happened to also be awesome and she moved her entire schedule around and called in a bunch of nurses just for me so that I could have Bernadette while my parents were both in town to take care of Naomi.

When I got to the hospital, all of the labor and delivery staff was waiting for me-- they were so sweet and continued to put me at ease about the surgery. They put in my IV, which I had previously been super scared of, with no glitches, and then Mike and I watched football on TV while we waited for the appointed hour. The anesthesiologist came in and was cracking jokes with me, and he was wearing a shnazzy doo rag, which was the very thing to calm me down. Then the doctor came and did one final ultrasound to make sure Bernadette hadn't flipped. I had grown very used to her head pressing on my ribs and her foot jabbing at my cervix, so I knew she hadn't, but they checked anyways. No change. In we went to get her out.

So, in addition to my fear of c-sections, I was also super scared of getting the spinal tap, but hey, there was nothing to it. It took all of 5 minutes, and then I could feel nothing at all from my neck down. And while it was weird that I was laying naked in a bright room filled with people listening to their favorite radio station and talking like I wasn't there, it was also comforting. They did this all the time: they saw naked ladies get cut open to get their babies out all the time. This was not out of the ordinary for them, and they were so good at it that they could do it while listening to music and talking. I liked that.

Once the doctor came in, Bernadette was out within 20 minutes, and I got to hold her immediately on my chest. Then they did their cleaning and weighing while they put me back together and moved me into recovery. I had Bernadette right away in recovery and the nurses were all super encouraging in terms of nursing. It was a little hard to do due to the drug-induced haze that I was in, but I still gave it a go, and in the end she was an even better nurser than Naomi.

The next few days were not easy-- I would say the first week out was the hardest-- but as long as I kept up with my pain meds, I was ok. And I had my baby.

As I get closer to birthing this new baby, I've gone back and forth between being really scared of having another c-section (since I'm totally convinced that this baby, too, is breech and probably won't turn just like her sister), and then not caring, since, at this point, I know I can get through either method of birthing.

I love sitting in on conversations where mothers are discussing ideal birthing situations: totally natural with focused breathing, offering up the pain, immediate nursing and skin-to-skin contact, the baby sleeping in the room with you the whole time you're in the hospital and how all these things contribute to bonding well with your baby-- and they really do, I agree. But I know that a mother who gives birth in a totally opposite, completely medicated way is no less a mother and has sacrificed no less than the natural-birthing mother to get that baby into the world healthily.

I'd say that now the most ideal situation for a birth is a healthy baby and a healthy mother. The end.

Gratuitous epilogue: In case you were wondering, after Bernadette came out the doctor immediately looked at her legs and told us that there was no way she could have flipped, much less come out naturally. One of her legs was completely wedged in my pelvis and had a little bruise on it for at least a week to prove it. I would have been jeopardizing her life little life if I had stuck to my Bradley-principled guns and tried for the natural birth. After that I was more grateful than ever for the option of a c-section.

Of course, I am still hoping to avoid a c-section this time around, since it is a major abdominal surgery and makes the recovery time 10 thousand times longer. But if I have a c-section, I'm sure the world will still be spinning, and spinning one newborn baby richer.

32 week alteration

I had high hopes for this pregnancy with regards to sewing.  I had seen a lot of do-it-yourself maternity clothes websites before getting pregnant and had also seen other talented folk do up some really cute maternity pieces (I hate saying "pieces", but my brain couldn't come up with a better word).

However, since pregnancy has ended up being a time of survival for me, I have just been trying to get through it. I enjoy all sorts of fabulous moments throughout, and even enjoy being pregnant at times, but for the most part when the girls are sleeping or playing happily, I am either sleeping or sitting on the couch. 

And so it is with great pride that I give you my one, lone alteration so far this pregnancy.

I found these sweet motherhood full panel XL maternity jeans this past weekend at a Goodwill 50% off-of-everything-sale and decided I would go for it.

I was just thrilled that they didn't actually fit, meaning I am not as XL as I thought I was.

I thoroughly enjoy the full panel because I feel like it helps the pants fall down less, and I also wanted another pair of skinny jeans. If I can't be skinny right now, at least my jeans can.

I wasn't sure how it would work with taking the butt/waist area in and in the end only a teeny bit of the pocket was sacrificed. I think the finished product was well worth it.

 I don't know what I am looking at, but this adequately captured the alteration, and at least someone is looking

And this one adequately captures the 32 belly picture. And veeeeeeeeery awkward leg lift. I was trying to use the leg to help hold the 30lb child.

To answer the question burning in your brains: was it actually cool enough to be wearing that outfit? NO!
But the weather has yet to cool the H down enough to catch up to my not-small-enough-to-wear-tank-tops-anymore arms, so this is what you get.

Happy 32 weeks!

Quick, boring, takes

Joining Jen and others for some quick takes to round up our week thus far.
I will warn you now, the boredom from reading may kill you.

1) One of my 2 besties here in the Bend moved far far away yesterday (I know, way to start the quick takes off on a bright note, Ana, you're the best!). But it's pretty much the main piece of news I've got for the week, and has left me only 96% down in the dumps, not too bad. I plan on writing a little homage to her at some point, but I am assuming that will require some actual thought and that it maybe shouldn't be written while fending the girls off with my feet. So, it may take a while.

I'm going to be fine

2) On that note, the interview process for a new best friend has commensed, I have written up a few criteria that I plan on sending out int he local news papers. Here are a few:
WANTED: A NEW BEST FRIEND. Must have:

• a cheerie disposition
• rosie cheeks
• be willing to play games
• no warts
• never cross or cruel
• are you catching on?

3) As a result of these recent sad occurances, I have been eating away my sorrows, as well as patting myself on the back for a job well done, with these little PUPPIES. Seriously, why did it take me so long to look up a recipe for oven-less chocolate chip cookies, it is JUST LIKE EATING COOKIE DOUGH. What could be better?

VIA

Now I must give the disclaimer that I substitute every even remotely healthy ingredient in this recipe for the unhealthy variety: all I can say is if you do that you will not be disappointed. I cannot speak for the healthy form of the recipe, but I know is my gut tells me that chocolate chip cookies should never try to be healthy. the end

4) We're having some fam-a-lam come to town in a few days, which means it is time for some of my semi-annual house cleaning, which I have motivation to do only when comparing it to the motivation I have for the alternate activity of working out. There is NOTHING I want to to less than to work out. Why?

5) Um, maybe because, since it only ever rains here or is so humid that you cannot breath and are left pealing your own skin off, that makes it so that going for our little morning jaunts is no longer a possibility. This leaves me with only one other workout option here to be done in the house. Which is pretty much like throwing yourself into a lion cage every morning.

So I chose to clean.

6) I am a whopping 27 weeks pregnant now, with no belly pictures for you, because you will be utterly convinced that I have my due date wrong and am in fact a full 40. Let's just say I am somewhere between this:

And this:

So maybe next week.

7) We are celebrating the triumphant return of QUINCY THE BEE! this week. A long lost family friend/pet who has come back a larger, hairier, totally different bee. The short explanation: dead bees make excellent house pets. The link above will provide much more explanation.
I will leave you with a not-so-quick video showcasing some of the excitement on his return:

Midnight Musings

I thought this 7 quick takes up in the middle of the night last night. Most of my better instincts are telling me not to actually post it, but I think I will just go with it and see where it takes me.

I am a terrible sleeper. How old am I, 2? No I am 27 and I just suck at sleeping, I always have. I will wake at the tiniest noise and then be awake in bed, unable to fall back asleep for hours. I also stink at napping, but we'll save that for another day, or never, whatev. So needless to say that an already bad sleeper and pregnancy, the mother of all sleep disruptions do. not. mix.

Here are some things I thouight up last night that would make my life a whole lot easier both now, while pregnant, and during non-pregnant times as well.

1.

A bed side toilet.  I think this would be splendid, only I don't think Mike would really appreciate it. A new topic for discussion for us.

2.

I will one-up number one and say that an at-home catheter would be even better, no need to move at all. I googled this, but I will leave out pictures for you squeamish ones. I don't know if this is even possible. Grace, can you ask Simon?

3.

An at-home incubator. Or really, just a Relaxman. After Jen's post on scorpions and the need to be totally confined during sleep, I think I am convinced. Only I don't know how comfortable these things are or if Mike would fork out the thousands of dollars for it. But I figure we could put this down in our basement, then I would never be awoken by any child/snoring husband/air conditioner noises/etc... ever again, what else could be worth thousands of dollars I ask you? Yeah, that's what I thought. 

4.

Middle of the night dinner buffet. It really needs to be a buffet because you never know what I want at 4 a.m., but I am almost always STARVING in the middle of the night and having to spread peanut butter on bread at that hour is just inconvenient, you know? This way the food is all ready, it's set out for me, and there are options. That is the key people, I need options. This one looks good:

I'll take it.

5.

Some sort of contraption that flips you from side to side when you need to move would be great. Sort of like a hammock in your bed, and you press a button and it flips you to whatever side you need to go to. Yeah, I don't really know how this would ever work, it's a real stretch.

6.

Some sort of over the bed, button activated, misting system with chloroform. Mike may be a little uncomfortable about this, but we could hang a tarp between us in case he is worried.

It would be quick and not leave me feeling droggy in the morning. Perfect!

7.

Or I could just offer it up like any really holy person and so many great saints who voluntarily gave up sleep in the spirit of mortification... to easy. 

So,  this is just some food for thought. 

Any other ideas would be most welcome. 

Go visit Jen and others for quick takes that will undoubtedly be a much better use of your time.

Happy Friday!

Whiny Weenie

As I approach with sheer terror my next dr. appointment, I have been putting fourth all efforts to keep the added poundage to a minimum- if only to avoid any further awkward/infuriating conversations. As a result I've been doing things like "exercising" and "having no joy in my life at all" "not eating sweets" which requires more than a little self control on my part, as well as averting my gaze from those darned McDonalds billboards slathered with delightful pictures of chocolate dipped vanilla soft served cones.

for the love of all that is good, somebody go out and eat one of these for me

This is most likely all in vain and will probably leave me utterly dejected and depressed after my upcoming visit. The plus side of that though is that I will most certainly eat my fattened sorrows away with the above treat.

As a part of my new desperate-attempt-to-not-gain-weight-routine we've been heading out for morning walks as many days of the week as we can and for as long as we can-- since it's already into the 90s by 9 a.m. and that is just yucky. We follow the walk with some hellish torture Jillian Michaels on some of the mornings.

This morning found me disciplined enough to get us the heck out the door, but I am not going to lie, I wanted to hitch a ride back to our house almost every step of the way. Here are some numbers to give you a glimpse into the fun:

• Number of pointless sprinklers doing nothing for people's yards but hitting the innocent pregnant mother with 2 toddlers just as she passes by-- 10 (or more)
• Number of dead birds run over-- 1
• Number of minutes I HAD TO PEE SO BADLY-- 38
• Number of times I needed push down as hard as possible on the handle of the double stroller to get it to go over the 1 inch bump in the side walk-- 38 appox
• Number of braxton hicks I had to lean on the stroller for support for and breath through-- 38 approx
• Number of decades of the rosary prayed out of desperation that I might not flip out on an whining toddler-- 2.5
• Number of drops I actually had in my bladder after returning home and sprinting to the bathroom to expel-- 10 
• Number of minutes I actually attempted to do any strength with Jillian-- 0
• Number of pounds probably gained from trying not to gain weight with this undoubtedly pointless routine-- who the hell knows, probably 3

I'm not complaining or anything. Wait, yes I am. I'm just a little bitter about the sprinklers.

And because everybody loves a super grainy picture of an increasingly pregnant woman:

more legit 25 wk.pic including head And reeeaaalllly big earrings.

I promise I will figure out my picture thing soon, this is getting to be ridiculous.

Now go read something that is actually entertaining.

Babies, Food, Pinterest, Pregnancy: Quick Takes

I'm steppin in up a notch in the realm of blogging this week.

Last night I checked my Google reader "deats and stats" or whatever it's called and it said that I am averaging 4.2 posts a week, up from 3.3!! What the heck all this .2, .3 crap is about I do not know.

So I am going to keep up that current stat by joining Jen and others for some Quick Takes this Friday.

1.

I am positively delighted that 1) it has gotten below the 100 degree mark outside so that I can justify baking in my home without sweating everyone out and 2) that I have an occasion to bake for tomorrow morning (I've offered to host a prayer group, pretty much just so that I can bake. joking?)

2.

Thanks to Grace's inspiration I will be making THESE at some point today. Because making cinnamon rolls may just be my very favorite thing to do in the world.

3.

I would really like to be known for my famous cinnamon rolls when I am an old lady, I think I am on the right track with this recipe. Also, I have been receiving subliminal messages from the baby in utero that these must be made and eaten pronto, there must be some vitamin I am lacking that is only present in maple frosting...

4.

I looked on Baby Center's website last night to see where the baby is developmentally and was so pleased but mostly confused to learn that she is the size of a rutabaga. Rutabaga, really?!?! You couldn't pick a vegetable/fruit that people actually eat/know what the heck it looks like? I navigated to another site that said "cauliflower", that's more like it. 

5.

I am 25 weeks, 2 days today. Yippee! Only 12 weeks left until I can start doing things to try to get this baby to come out.

About to go do some "exercise" aka pregnant body flopping about with 70 lbs o'children + clunky double stroller. Face left out for your benefit, it's still too early for a head shot.

* Picture taken with photobooth, a low enough quality photo that my blogger lets me upload it. I still haven't figured out my photo-space thing.

6.

I got off of Pinterest a few weeks ago in the interest of not wasting any more time on the interwebs than I already do. Also so that I would stop feeling like a less-than-adequate housewife. But I am not going to lie, I may be going through some withdraw. I just need to see some beautiful pictures of food/houses/clothes, you know. Why is that?? 

Maybe you can convince me to get back on...

7.

And now this marks the 14th time I've been interrupted in the last 14 minutes trying to write this, so I am going to go ahead and be done. You're welcome.

Things I don't like to do: Pregnancy edition

Joining the ever awesome Jen for some free complaining via 7 quick takes this blazin' Friday.
Since I figured that you are dying to know the top 7 things I do not ever want to do while pregnant, here they are-- 7 being the one I want to do the least of all-- for your reading pleasure:

1.

Eat healthily. You may recall from several of my pregnancy posts that this is a struggle. It is my main struggle during the first trimester and then for the rest of the time it isn't that bad except for when I just want to plop down on the couch and enjoy a 1/2 bad of frozen chocolate chips. Then it's hard.

2.

Not talk about pregnancy. That is, while I am pregnant, I could sit and talk pregnancy for hours, HOURS I tell you. This is something I am not proud of and am working on since I know the rest of the world should be spared gratuitous uterine talk.

3.

Not drink. All I want to do is drink when I am pregnant. It always sounds good and can not always happen as it is generally frowned upon-- at least in public. And let's be honest, if there were ever a time you could use a stiff drink it is during pregnancy, especially when there are other small hellians at your feet all. day. long.

Just enjoying a potent afternoon cocktail at 9 months pregnant. C'mon, we all know that Mad Men=real life

4.

Give birth to the baby. I am terrified of all things labor and prefer to be in complete denial up until the day that things absolutely must happen. Which is why my second birthing experience being a c-section was not half bad. As Steph aptly describes it, it was pretty much like going into Starbucks, ordering your coffee and taking it home. 
But I could really do without the whole recovery from a major surgery/having my entire midsection sliced open/not being able to role over in bed by myself for 2 weeks, etc... I prefer to rip the band aid off and take the babe home like I did the first time. I am, nevertheless, terrified. 

5.

Cleaning. Shouldn't someone else be doing this for me while I am in this condition?

6.

Working out.  Again, shouldn't someone else be doing this for me while I am in this condition?

as proof that while I DO NOT WANT to do any of these things, I do them anyways (occasionally). And I force my children to do them with me. Look at Bernadette's form on that push up. Impressive.

7.

Wake up. If I could I would sleep the pregnancy off, labor in my sleep, and then be holding the baby. I am barely partially kidding.

What are your least favorite activities during pregnancy??

A beached whale seeks advice

I'd like to share with you a conversation I had the other day at my almost 22 week doctor's appointment between me and my doctor. Please note a few things:

1) I've waited a few days to spew this out into the internets in order to not call my doctor terrible names and slander her on the world wide web.
2) The actually conversation has been altered a bit for dramatic effect and because I cannot remember it in detail anymore, I mean it was 2 WHOLE DAYS ago.

For the sake of privacy we'll call my doctor, Dr. Meansly. I will be called Ana.



Dr. Meansly: Are there any issues you wanted to talk about? It says here you get terrible migraines and are having lots and lots of contractions with other things that are concerning you and what not....

Ana: yes that's right

Dr: here's a prescription for the migraines.... and you're fine, now let's talk about your weight gain.

Ana: ok

Dr: I am a little concerned about this because you have already gained THIS much weight, and I really don't want you to come in and deliver a 9 pound baby if I am trying to VBAC you. You REALLY need to watch your diet.

Ana: yes, I gained a lot at the beginning since I felt so sick and just needed to eat all the time and whatever I could stomach in order to not be puking all day... (still trying to talk)

Dr: Yes, but you have already gained THIS much and you're only 21 weeks and you've already gained THIS much, you REALLY need to watch your diet...

Ana: (cutting in) yes, I know, but since my last appointment I have only gained 3 pounds and have slowed down substantially so obviously I have changed my diet considerably and will continue to do so.

Dr: Ok, good, because I would have expected any other woman at 21 weeks to have only gained 5 pounds and you have already gained THIS much, so you really need to slow down and REALLY need to watch your diet.

Ana: (trying not to begin weeping and punching all at the same time) Yes, ok, I've only gained 3 pounds since the last visit but ok, I will work on that.



Before the appointment when I looked in the mirror I saw this:

After I pretty much only saw something more akin to a beached whale.

I have over shared about weight before, so I will not go on too long. But I left the appointment wondering a few things:

1) Am I supposed to go on a diet?
2) How much should I work out while pregnant?
3) Is Dr. Meansly being for real that if I gain more than 30 pounds during pregnancy I am going to birth an enormous mini-whale baby?
4) Why do I go to Dr. Meansly again? Right because barely any doctors will do VBACS anymore and I have limited to zero choice in the matter.

Ok, so I answered the last question easily. And honestly, she is a very good, competent doctor and she was very sensitive to us having just miscarried and to the fact that we were a little over-paranoid about how this baby is doing and I really needed that. But I am kind of a sheepish middle child who pretty much always apologizes first because I HATE confrontation and HATE people being mad at me or mean to me and really like NICE people and am very sensitive and cry pretty easily and am not thick skinned and will spare you anymore needless personal details, but you get it. I did not quite know how to deal with the mean factor and the feeling that I was back in my chubby middle school days being made fun of by the mean kid in school.

And as for question #3, it turns out she isn't a complete idiot as I was able to find a few articles right away on a mother's weight gain during pregnancy effecting her child's weight at birth (although the studies seemed to be focusing more on women who were already very overweight and then gain like 50 pounds or more on top of that) but still I guess that is a legit concern on her part, I mean look at me, we can all see I am bordering on obese.

But the other 2 questions left me a bit puzzled and genuinely seeking the advice and sage wisdom of this wonderful blog community of other ladies who have had babies.
How the heck do you get fit during pregnancy without jeopardizing your own health or the health of baby? What sorts of work outs do you like best? (I tried running yesterday and had about 10 extremely painful contractions in about 30 minutes, so we're not going to re-visit that). I have pretty much only done Jillian Michaels and Pilates in the past year, and running when not pregnant- I even did some Jillian today and enjoyed it! But I am thinking that maybe the more huge I get the harder doing never-going-to-be-pregnant-because-of-what-it-will-do-to-my-body-Jillian will be.

So what's your diet/fitness poison while pregnant? DO share, because I cannot face another appointment like that, and I would honestly like to go in and baffle Dr. Meansly with my impeccable strides in the fitness arena at my next appointment.

OTI: you-pick style

I was not planning on doing this OTI thing again, since I try to steer clear of fashion blerging, and and I do not fancy myself a particularly "fashionable person", so I don't want to be a poser. However, I made the exception today for a few reasons:

a) I saw on Grace's blog that today's is a you-pick-your-own-inspiration type of thing, so that makes things much easier,

2) I might be the most exhausted woman on the planet, thank you Mad Men/Nauseatingly early rising toddler combo from h-e-double tooth picks, so this knocks out a blog post for me in about 5.5 seconds. Take picture, upload picture and dumb captions, post=easy peasy.

3/c) When I put my outfit on this morning I had a vague recollection that I was going for something I had seen in a celebrity picture and since I do not read any celebrity stuff except for Suri, I knew right where to look and BAM, I found it:

So here you go: stripes on light pink with some pearl action

Again with the striped maternity shirt. Pregnant wardrobe is sparse. 
Shirt: Old Navy; Skirt: Gap. Necklace, bracelet, & shoes: forever 21

Also again with the looking-down pose. I figured that all the celebs who are used as inspiration in these things look like they have no idea anyone is taking their picture, so I am just going to get on that train and ride it since I take the most awkward pictures of myself. ever.

Blog post done, now go visit Erica, Kayla and Grace for other more hip interpretations while I go off to nappy land.

OTI: Grace's pick

In the spirit of keeping things fresh, I'm gonna go ahead and link up with Grace today for a little interpreting of an outfit (also I bought a skirt at my favorite thrift store the other day and have been wanting to wear it, although I may never make out of the house in it for fear of looking tent-ish).

Without further ado, here is Grace's outfit pick:

And my "looking-nothing-like-super-hot-Reese" interpretation:

Blouse: garage sale find; Skirt: St. Vincent de Paul thrift store; Belt: Target; Favorite sandals hiding in the grass: Target (**favorite Target sandals have since died due to over-wear, RIP favorite sandals); Black workout head band that completely clashes with everything: Walmart- oops

Go see Grace's WAY cuter, way more accurately interpreted outfit. Now.

Monumentals

Yesterday marked some rather ground breaking things in a few different, sort of related, arenas.

1) I went to the doc for my 16 week appointment and found out that, since Christmas, I have already gained back HALF of the weight that I lost last year (if you read the post where I mentioned how much I lost you can do the math, if you didn't I will not divulge it now). Isn't that amazing!?!?! Personally, I am impressed with myself- also a little disgusted- but mostly impressed. If you read this post a while back you know about my preoccupation.

before

after

And back again. Bad lighting+awkward smile=typical ana pregnancy picture

and

2) I participated in the first form of exercise since being about 6 weeks pregnant- a 10 week break from working out and I went from having this as my daily workout routine 4 short months ago:

to barely being able to jog 1/4 mile. Also impressive.

Now I will give myself some credit here and say I had NEVER been that skinny/in shape ever in my life before, so I was bound to regress at some point AND I am actually ahead of the game in terms of where I was weight wise when I was pregnant with Bernadette- so I am feeling good.

But with all that said, I am beginning my pregnancy diet/workout regiment to attempt to not gain an average of 8 pounds every doctor's appointment. This plan really just means:

• no more daily fast food, for every meal
• no more mid-morning hot dog snacks
• no more nightly reeses cups (sniff)
• not more middle of the night confetti cake 
• do anything at all by way of physical activity. I think I will try some of Dwija's tricks.
• maybe try to eat every 3 hours instead of every 2

It's gonna be rough people, I am not gonna lie, but I think I can do it.

3) Unrelated, but watch out, I am sewing again.

And it is going to rock your world

4) And the last monumental thing that's been happening recently worth noting:

The girls are finally deciding to both smile for pictures together (yes that is a smile for Bernadette there) and it is making for some better pictures. 

Here's to changes on many fronts!

7 quick takes: Awkward baby comments edition

Yesterday I took my 2 sweet girls for a walk to take some "new" neighbors a house warming-ish gift of banana bread (they have been in the neighborhood for many many months now and I am just getting around to this) I am a regular Mister Rogers.

Anyways, on my little jaunt we ran into my sweet elderly old lady neighbor and stopped to talk for bit during which time it came out that several of the new families in the neighborhood have at least a couple small children- this fact greatly excited me as the general population of our neighborhood is currently of the same elderly make-up as this said woman. Our sweet neighbor expressed that she too was happy that there would be "more children" in the neighborhood, at which point she asked the ages of our girls. I said "3, 18 months, and we have another on the way!" (excitedly with big smile) and she responded "Oh, Ok". That was it. Her general happiness at the thought of more children faded almost immediately with my little announcement. Maybe she pictured in that moment our whole street crawling with babies: babies on her roof and in her vegetable garden, babies coming our of her heating vents, I don't know. I am inclined to think that we just crossed the line with our whole "were gonna break the rules and have more than 2 kids" attitude.

Anywho, this was the first reaction of this nature I've gotten since conceiving this babe and I fully expect to have many, many more like it in the next 5 1/2 months.
Here are some others I think we'll encounter (way more exciting than, "Oh, Ok"- she could have done better than that)

1) "You're done, right?" (not even "are you done?" this person feels the need to really impose what you should be doing first, then double check, "right?")

2) "How many kids are you going to have?" (I always picture a teenage, air head asking this question, as if there is actually an answer)

3) "You know what causes that, right?" (This one deserves as awkward as a response as you can think of, since it is the MOST awkward question anyone could ever ask)

4) "You're a baby making machine" (A friend just told me she got this response, I can't quite think of what is going through the person's head who says this)

5) The immediate defensive remark like "We're waiting", or "we waited" or the explanations of how they are done and have been sterilized (this puts you in a really weird position, but it is at least a conversation starter, unlike the rest of them)

6) "You're going to have your hands full" (why yes I am)

7) "Why?" (again, at least a conversation starter)

Let me know if you've gotten other responses so I can prepare myself for them, also if you have any good responses, I'd love to hear them!

For more quick-type takes, visit Jen and many others at Conversion Diary.

It's a miwacle!

Around the time of Bernadette's birth, Mike was out on a weekly thrift store run and found this movie:

   

... perfect for the upcoming arrival.

We thought that it would be great for when the girls got older, and especially for Bernadette to learn about her namesake. This was a nice thought, but then she was born and it turned out that I needed to plop her older sister in front of it for at least one viewing a day in order to get anything done stay sane.

This has resulted in a wonderful devotion of Naomi to her sister's patroness, which I will never discourage, but it has also resulted in some other habits as well. Such as the one where Naomi, while playing outside, at the playground, in my parents' yard, or anywhere at all, will suddenly kneel down in whatever given spot she has designated as "the grotto" and begin to "pray a rosary" sure that she will see Our Lady. Another habit formed immediately upon first seeing the video is one where if she is in or around water, even just drinking it, she needs to dip her arm in it and lift it out proclaiming "It's a miwacle!" What a little saint we have...

A saint in the making?

-------

You may have heard (by heard, I mean seen) me talk (and by talk I mean type) about my not-so-little super glamorous full body pregnancy rash before (complaining in 3 different posts isn't overkill, is it?). At my last doctor's appointment, the doc took one look at it and said "Oh yeah, that's PUPPS. I am so sorry." When I asked what I could do to make it go away, she quickly and bluntly responded, "Nothing, it will not go away until after pregnancy and there isn't that I can give you to treat it."

And then I fought back bursting into tears for pretty much the entire appointment--I was a leeedle discouraged. So I called Mike when she left the room to have me disrobe and broke the news to him that he would have a nasty, rashy, complainy wife for the next 6 months and I continued to fight back the tears. He said something really encouraging, as he always does, and I ignored it and felt discouraged and bad for myself, as I always do.

When I arrived home from my never-ending doctor's appointment, Mike said that he had an idea. He handed me a bottle of Lourdes water and suggested that I drink some and pour it over my afflicted areas, aka, everywhere, and just pray for Mary's intercession for healing and for the grace to be able to echo her "fiat" to God--"thy will be done." (one helpful, holier-than-me spouse? check.) At this point I would say I was a bit desperate, so as soon as the girls were down for naps, I did just as he suggested, dousing myself and taking shots of the the holy water and seriously praying for a little "miwacle."

I have waited a few weeks to make sure that the thing stayed far away, but I would say within one day it started to improve and within one week my skin went from looking like it had gotten hit with a million skin meteors to now looking normal, and I am no longer scratching myself like a flee ridden dog. I'm not saying it was a miracle (um, maybe I am), but I'm feeling so much better now, and it sure doesn't hurt to feel like I got the hookup from Mama Mary.

Our Lady of Lourdes, pray for us!

Prayers for the pregnants

Every single time I sit down to write this, someone poops herself or another MUST have that princess NOW and will not stop screaming/pushing sister/convulsing/raising hell until mother comes to her rescue and gets back the prized princess this instant. I kind of feel like I am trapped in a stinking den of diapers and whining, so much so that just now, as I went to throw away what was perhaps the most heinous smelling diaper in my career as a mom, I walked out of the house to pitch it and noticed that the garbage can was all the way at the end of the drive way because it is trash day, and my excitement was unspeakable. Usually this would bum me out because I have to walk 3 times the distance carrying a nasty diaper, but not today- today it brought me the biggest sense of relief and freedom. The children were trapped in the basement and couldn't do too much harm to themselves in that 3 minute window, and these were I my moments. I walked as slowly as I possibly could to the trash can with the stinky diaper stench wafting in my face from the breeze. I loved every second of it. Anyways, I figured you were wondering about our morning so far and how I am feeling super burnt out and in need of a serious vacation. Serious.


This brings me to my next point- I have been thinking a lot about all my friends (in real life and in the interblogs) who are expecting little babes. As commonplace as pregnancy is in most of the circles I run in, it is a a pretty huge deal overall (you know, creating and bringing fourth new life), and it is also one of the most difficult times--physically, mentally, and spiritually--that we women go through, so it deserves extra recognition and prayers. Whether you are at the tail-end of your pregnancy like Cari and Steph (read these posts), waiting anxiously for your body to catch up with your will to get the baby out, or at the very beginning dealing with the excruciatingly intense nausea like my friend Natalie (this is my least favorite part of pregnancy). Whichever way you slice it, it is so. darn. hard.

After reading my good friend Maureen's post yesterday, things really fell into perspective for me in two ways: 1) my lame problems are just that, lame, and nothing compared to what so many others have to deal with during pregnancy (this does not mean I will stop complaining, but I may try to limit it, we'll see); and 2) I should probably use this blog community (and my little community here in SB) as more of a means to pray for and build up my fellow mother friends. Similarly, I should probably use my burned-out feelings as something to offer up for all you moms rather than just as something new to complain about on my blog.

So that is what I am working on, and every time I actually succeed in thinking to offer up prayers for fellow mom friends, I give myself a big pat on the back--that way I keep it up. Like the other day when I actually remembered to pray for my mucho pregnant friend, Jenny and THAT DAY she had her baby! God knows what he is doing. I never actually remember to do things like this, so it was especially cool. (Jenny, I am not saying that my super efficacious prayers are what responsible for the safe arrival of your little one, but it is worth a thought.) So I will surely be trying to remember to pray for all of you blog friends (and non-blog friends, you're in my head too) bearing babies, those listed above and many others: Dwija, Bridget, Sheena, Ashley, Jillian, Lauren. I know there are more, but these are the ones I can think of now with my nearly useless pregnancy brain (feel free to suggest additions in the combox). To all of you expectant mothers: thoughts and prayers your way.


Of course as I finally finish this post my toddlers are peacefully sitting and reading and being absolute angels- giving credit where it is due, they are pretty awesome.

Pregnant is the new drunk...

Ok, so I might not be slurring when I speak (at least not yet), but I'm pretty sure that my brain is confusing "baby" with "booze," because I. am. not. right.

The thoughts in my head, they just don't stay straight anymore, probably since my short-term memory now only extends about four seconds into the past. This makes intelligent, sophisticated conversations difficult. Who am I kidding- it renders *coherent* conversations completely impossible.

For example, yesterday, or maybe it was last week, I was talking to my friend at playgroup, or perhaps it was my husband, or the neighbor lady who looks like my husband, and we were talking about something about the thing that she was saying and I was like "Oh wow, that's so great!"

Yeah so I don't remember anything about anything.

See, I can follow what's being said, for a moment anyway, but I have no way of keeping track of how to formulate an appropriate response. And because I won't be able to remember what I say anyway, I've started to not even care.

Loss of inhibitions? Check

And I've already talked, um... ad nauseam, about feeling sick.

So, nausea and vomiting? check

Difficulty walking a straight line (or at least staying on my feet)? Check

How did this get here again?

Then there's my short-term memory, which I could swear cuts out like every four seconds so that I can't remember what I've just said or done. Thankfully, there's my trusty camera to capture my moments of greatest triumph. Like when the refrigerator into which I placed the mayonnaise turned into the pantry overnight, probably miraculously.

Oh, and all these preggo hormones have got me feeling alternatingly weepy and crazy sentimental for Mike and girls, so yeah, I maybe cry for no reason and tell everyone around me how much I love them and how great they are.

My brilliant conclusion: Pregnancy = drunk.

Wow, I should probably stop driving now before something like this happens. On the plus side, if I was to get pulled over, that would give SuperFunnyInsightfulMomBloggerHeroSimchaFisher and me something in common, right? Hmmm, on second thought, I do need to get some more mayo, so maybe a trip to the store's in order.

If I could only remember where I left my keys.