It's a miwacle!

Around the time of Bernadette's birth, Mike was out on a weekly thrift store run and found this movie:

   

... perfect for the upcoming arrival.

We thought that it would be great for when the girls got older, and especially for Bernadette to learn about her namesake. This was a nice thought, but then she was born and it turned out that I needed to plop her older sister in front of it for at least one viewing a day in order to get anything done stay sane.

This has resulted in a wonderful devotion of Naomi to her sister's patroness, which I will never discourage, but it has also resulted in some other habits as well. Such as the one where Naomi, while playing outside, at the playground, in my parents' yard, or anywhere at all, will suddenly kneel down in whatever given spot she has designated as "the grotto" and begin to "pray a rosary" sure that she will see Our Lady. Another habit formed immediately upon first seeing the video is one where if she is in or around water, even just drinking it, she needs to dip her arm in it and lift it out proclaiming "It's a miwacle!" What a little saint we have...

A saint in the making?

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You may have heard (by heard, I mean seen) me talk (and by talk I mean type) about my not-so-little super glamorous full body pregnancy rash before (complaining in 3 different posts isn't overkill, is it?). At my last doctor's appointment, the doc took one look at it and said "Oh yeah, that's PUPPS. I am so sorry." When I asked what I could do to make it go away, she quickly and bluntly responded, "Nothing, it will not go away until after pregnancy and there isn't that I can give you to treat it."

And then I fought back bursting into tears for pretty much the entire appointment--I was a leeedle discouraged. So I called Mike when she left the room to have me disrobe and broke the news to him that he would have a nasty, rashy, complainy wife for the next 6 months and I continued to fight back the tears. He said something really encouraging, as he always does, and I ignored it and felt discouraged and bad for myself, as I always do.

When I arrived home from my never-ending doctor's appointment, Mike said that he had an idea. He handed me a bottle of Lourdes water and suggested that I drink some and pour it over my afflicted areas, aka, everywhere, and just pray for Mary's intercession for healing and for the grace to be able to echo her "fiat" to God--"thy will be done." (one helpful, holier-than-me spouse? check.) At this point I would say I was a bit desperate, so as soon as the girls were down for naps, I did just as he suggested, dousing myself and taking shots of the the holy water and seriously praying for a little "miwacle."

I have waited a few weeks to make sure that the thing stayed far away, but I would say within one day it started to improve and within one week my skin went from looking like it had gotten hit with a million skin meteors to now looking normal, and I am no longer scratching myself like a flee ridden dog. I'm not saying it was a miracle (um, maybe I am), but I'm feeling so much better now, and it sure doesn't hurt to feel like I got the hookup from Mama Mary.

Our Lady of Lourdes, pray for us!

Prayers for the pregnants

Every single time I sit down to write this, someone poops herself or another MUST have that princess NOW and will not stop screaming/pushing sister/convulsing/raising hell until mother comes to her rescue and gets back the prized princess this instant. I kind of feel like I am trapped in a stinking den of diapers and whining, so much so that just now, as I went to throw away what was perhaps the most heinous smelling diaper in my career as a mom, I walked out of the house to pitch it and noticed that the garbage can was all the way at the end of the drive way because it is trash day, and my excitement was unspeakable. Usually this would bum me out because I have to walk 3 times the distance carrying a nasty diaper, but not today- today it brought me the biggest sense of relief and freedom. The children were trapped in the basement and couldn't do too much harm to themselves in that 3 minute window, and these were I my moments. I walked as slowly as I possibly could to the trash can with the stinky diaper stench wafting in my face from the breeze. I loved every second of it. Anyways, I figured you were wondering about our morning so far and how I am feeling super burnt out and in need of a serious vacation. Serious.


This brings me to my next point- I have been thinking a lot about all my friends (in real life and in the interblogs) who are expecting little babes. As commonplace as pregnancy is in most of the circles I run in, it is a a pretty huge deal overall (you know, creating and bringing fourth new life), and it is also one of the most difficult times--physically, mentally, and spiritually--that we women go through, so it deserves extra recognition and prayers. Whether you are at the tail-end of your pregnancy like Cari and Steph (read these posts), waiting anxiously for your body to catch up with your will to get the baby out, or at the very beginning dealing with the excruciatingly intense nausea like my friend Natalie (this is my least favorite part of pregnancy). Whichever way you slice it, it is so. darn. hard.

After reading my good friend Maureen's post yesterday, things really fell into perspective for me in two ways: 1) my lame problems are just that, lame, and nothing compared to what so many others have to deal with during pregnancy (this does not mean I will stop complaining, but I may try to limit it, we'll see); and 2) I should probably use this blog community (and my little community here in SB) as more of a means to pray for and build up my fellow mother friends. Similarly, I should probably use my burned-out feelings as something to offer up for all you moms rather than just as something new to complain about on my blog.

So that is what I am working on, and every time I actually succeed in thinking to offer up prayers for fellow mom friends, I give myself a big pat on the back--that way I keep it up. Like the other day when I actually remembered to pray for my mucho pregnant friend, Jenny and THAT DAY she had her baby! God knows what he is doing. I never actually remember to do things like this, so it was especially cool. (Jenny, I am not saying that my super efficacious prayers are what responsible for the safe arrival of your little one, but it is worth a thought.) So I will surely be trying to remember to pray for all of you blog friends (and non-blog friends, you're in my head too) bearing babies, those listed above and many others: Dwija, Bridget, Sheena, Ashley, Jillian, Lauren. I know there are more, but these are the ones I can think of now with my nearly useless pregnancy brain (feel free to suggest additions in the combox). To all of you expectant mothers: thoughts and prayers your way.


Of course as I finally finish this post my toddlers are peacefully sitting and reading and being absolute angels- giving credit where it is due, they are pretty awesome.

How much is too much?

I found myself saying a lot this week that "too much is being asked of me". Between constant nausea and fatigue and 2 girls in constant need of attention and for me to get them things (one with the croup all week and sleeping terribly) I have been feeling totally burnt out. We would be outside and trying to enjoy ourselves in the sunshine and all I would be thinking about is how tired and sick I felt, how all I really wanted was to be in my bed not pushing my girls on the swings. Naomi asked me something while I was swinging them and I just said to her "no, too much is being asked of me". I know I said it to Mike on at least one occasion as well. That is how I have felt all week, stretched thin and barely able to function, let alone make life sweet and pleasant for the people I am serving all day.

Fitting, isn't it that I've felt this way the entirety of Holy Week? I've shed quite a few tears because of my own sufferings this week and have not flinched at the sufferings of my Lord for me. I sat to pray this morning. I figured it's Good Friday, I should probably pray. I read this in my little prayer book "In Conversation with God": "He was not content to suffer a little; he wished to drink the chalice to the dregs without leaving a single drop behind, so that we might learn the greatness of his love and the baseness of sin, so that we may be generous in self-giving, in mortification and in service of others". He did not say "too much is being asked of me", he did not stop at the first fall, at the second, at the third. He has given me the only example of generous self-giving that I need.

Jesus did not stop half way through the way of the Cross and say, "no, too much is being asked of me". And as the Lord showers down abundant blessing on me: my husband, my children, my family, no real problems in life, so many blessings, do I ever push them away saying, "no, it's too much". Nope, I take them all, most of the time forgetting to even say "thank you". And when the sufferings come, when the sacrifices are asked of me, sure I take them because I have to- then I make sure to let everyone around me know how much I am giving and how hard it all is. I make sure to say to the Lord and to those around me that "too much is being asked of me". The gifts are not too much, but the sacrifices- too much. Clear evidence that I am not looking to the Cross enough, or following the example I have on every wall my house of being "generous in self-giving, in mortification and in service of others", of Jesus who never said "too much is being asked of me".

How to fail during Lent

Joining Jen and many others for 7 quick takes.

Over the past 11 years of seriously trying to be a good Catholic, I think that I have become somewhat of an expert on Lent. Yes I think that I have gotten it down.

Oh you thought I meant sacrifice? Penance? No, no. I have become a veritable expert at how to really botch Lent. I really cannot think of Lent where I got to the end thinking "I did it! I kept to everything I set out to do! Huzzah!"

So without further ado, in case you were sitting around thinking that you were doing too well this Lent, here are some things you can do to cut yourself down to size.
7 ways to fail during Lent:

1) Don't give anything up. Just tell yourself that you will cut down on everything. After all it is all about moderation and you are the picture of it, right?  (You probably are, I on the other hand...)

2) Hop on the Internet first thing in the morning even though your prayer books are sitting right next to your computer. Your email CANNOT wait!!

3) Continue to buy lots of sweet treats to indulge in and tell yourself they are for the kids.

I did not eat any (lying)

4) Have lots of conversations about Lent with your friends and how they are doing with their sacrifices to ensure that you feel good and discouraged about whatever you did set out to do.

5) Do lots of online shopping, no better way to stay in the spirit of the world.

6) Tell yourself that you'll get it together by the Triduum, that's when all the good stuff happens anyways.

7) Expect that your toddler will remind you to do stations of the cross every Friday, she is the one with the little book that you use so this is on her.

But for real, I am really glad there are a few weeks left, I usually don't compile a list like this in my head until the very end and then sit a feel bad about myself, so this is an improvement. Baby steps.

Have a blessed rest of Lent!