Monday, March 17, 2014

Too Much Talking



Naomi (while coloring a Little Mermaid picture): Mom, do you know what color Ariel's broads are? You know the things she wears under her shirt?
Ana: No, I don't know what color her bra is
Naomi: Well do you have a naked picture of her? I really just need a naked picture of her so I can tell the color of her broads. Do you have one?
Ana: nope
Naomi: Alright, I guess I'll just go with purple then.

Ana: Do you guys want breakfast?
Naomi: Breakfast? Yes! I'm hungry! Hungry as a butler!

Naomi (while drinking her juice): Boy this coffee is good! Best I've tasted in all my life!

Bernadette (ultra serious): Mom, I need to tell you something.
Ana: Yes?
Bernadette: Whenever you feel like you need to turn into an octopus, just go ahead and turn into one... ok?
Ana: Ok

During one of Bernadette's many stubborn border-line tantrum moments, I was trying to talk her down and attempting to have her look at me while we talked, I lightly touched her chin:
Naomi (with a loud gasp): Ah! Don't strike the child!

While all of us were eating cereal at breakfast:
Bernadette: Mom, the baby in your belly is sitting right there (points to the chair I am sitting in)
Ana: Well, actually the baby is swimming around, but yes, the baby is right here.
Naomi: Oh yes! Because the milk that you're eating goes right down into your belly and the baby is swimming in it!

After at least a 10 minnute silent stretch the Naomi and Bernadette doing something in the bathroom:
Ana: Girls, come out of the bathroom please
Naomi: Ok, if it pleases you, Bernadette shall come.

Bernadette: Mom, Lucy's name is no longer "Lucy", is now "Loves First Kiss"!
Ana

Naomi: Mom, remember when Bernadette was in your wound and I was just a little baby?
Ana: What?
Naomi: When Bernadette was in your wound and I was just a small baby?
Ana: You mean my womb?
Naomi: Oh yes, your womb.  

Bernadette: I had a baby in my belly! She just popped right out from kicking and kicking! She just kicked and kicked and kicked and then I said: "Oh! Oh! Oh! Maybe my baby's just going to pop right out, and she did!!
Ana: Wow.

Naomi: Mom, can you please clean this little cob web off my finger?
Ana: Yes (cleans off finger)
Naomi: It's just so gross, a Cob must have made a web out in the play room.
Ana:...
(homeschooling is going really well)

Ana: Bernadette, can you please stay out in the play room to play with Lucy, she is crying because she's lonely.
Bernadette: Uhhhh, well I will come back and play with her at about half past May. Ok? (runs away)

While trying very hard to get Bernadette to stop talking and finish her breakfast:
Bernadette: Ok, but after I finish this bite I am going to tell you  lots of happy stories...
Ana: Ok, I just want you to eat.
Bernadette: Of many sad, sad orphans...

Lucy (pointing to crucifix on the wall): Hee-sus!
Lucy (pointing to picture of the pope): Hee-sus!
Lucy (pointing to picture of me and Mike from our wedding): Hee-sus!
Lucy (pointing to a fat cat picture in the bathroom): Hee-sus!

9 comments :

  1. Hahahahaha... These posts are the best!!!

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  2. I love reading all the cute things your kids say!

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  3. Hahaha these are hilarious! "Don't strike the child" was definitely my favorite :)

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  4. I am pretty sure that every single Too Much Talking contains the phrase "true love's kiss." You've got some romantics on your hand!

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  5. Hee-sus the cat! If we get a cat, I'm totally naming him Hee-sus.

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  6. Of many sad sad orphans...
    Dying. And I think our daughters would get along famously.

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  7. That line bout "half past May" had to have come from Frog ad Tod, amiright?!

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