Friday, August 24, 2012

7 whiny takes

I got a few comments after my annoyingly positive post urging me not to change the feel of my blog. And after yesterday and this morning, well, you need not fear faithful readers.

So I give you 7 whiny takes, all before 10 a.m., with waaaaaay too many life deats and pictures all on the back end.

1) Yesterday was pretty bad, I can't quite put into words why, but I think it had something to do with crushing back pain, and the feeling that I was trapped inside a airtight box filled with small people yelling at me to get them things, smashing my lungs and other vital organs, and kicking my bladder. It wasn't until Mike came up from work and perceptively surmised from me yelling "I'm done!" at him and him proceeding to take the girls for a 30 minute walk to give me a break that things felt like they weren't actually going to kill me.

2) I got to bed on time hoping to catch up on sleep to ease the discouragement I was feeling only to be awoken at 5 on the nose by the in utero babe karate chopping my bladder demanding that I empty it immediately and give her some more frickin room.

3) When I walked into the hall, there was a small child laying there. And by small I mean a child weighing at least 50 lbs who was fast asleep and needed me to pick her dead weight up and place it in bed. This did not make the inutero child happy since I had not yet emptied the bladder and was now crushing her with the 50lb ex-utero toddler. Then I emptied it, laid back down and she was appeased.

4) After laying awake for a while, the other toddler of the house awoke at 6:30 and I forced her to lay with me until after 7 when the older one who had been wandering around the house for some time finally came and dragged us from the bed.

5) I clothed them and myself, threw our tired selves into the van, and found sanctuary at a nearby over-priced grocery store with a cafe+starbucks.
Where donuts were purchased strong coffee was inhaled faster than is probably natural.

6) And small children were fed copious amounts of sugar and gratuitous amounts of pictures were taken on my phone.

7) Now it is 10 a.m., the coffee and sugar have worn off, and there is a party of small animals and children dressed like adults playing at my side.
But at least you got to see that much of my leg before lunch-- let's focus on the good things here. 

For more got see Jen


  1. Yes! Coffee and donuts - that's what has been missing from my morning. I will remedy that ASAP - thanks for the reminder (and the adorable kiddo pics)!

  2. Coffee and donuts make everything better! My coffee is in hand, but I may just have to go on a donut run... no wonder I no longer fit into my shorts.

  3. hahaha I love your blog, whatever you write =). I def appreciate knowing other people how their struggles though...cause it just makes everyone relax a little bit =). i had a pastry one morning at that same is overpriced, but like your situation, that time I just needed something nearby and easy/fast. i think you pretty much made everyone's day by sharing that little slice of leg with us. here's to hoping for a good friday!

  4. Donuts. Stop it. Never again. I don't know where I can get a donut right now.

    Also, big props for getting up and ready for the day and out the door before 10 am. You're my hero.

  5. Coffee here this morning, too. And a brownie. Yes. I had an invader this morning also. At 5:30. And he's 7. Can I bold that somehow? SEVEN. As he tiptoed sweetly to my side of the bed, I vaguely remember muttering (in my nicest Mommy-loves-you voice) No. No. No. You may NOT come down here at 5:30. GET BACK IN BED. At which point he decided the better part of valor was to scurry back from whence he came and leave the mean Mommy to sleep a little more. Wise child.

  6. And by the looks of it, you had Starbucks mostly to yourselves, which is always a bonus.

  7. I love them clever husbands with their clever detectiving skillz...

  8. donuts, coffee, leg shot. I'm liking all of this.

    also- I hate to be a creeper, but is that Martin's? I was lucky enough to live in the 'Bend for a spell so it looks a little familiar.