Pregnancy is so tricky. 15 weeks came and I was sure I was in the clear with crazy debilitating nausea, but then 16.5 weeks hit and it was back in full force, kicking my butt and ravaging my home yet again. Here we are now at 18 weeks and I am foolishly hopeful that maybe, just maybe, I will see some sweet relief in the next few weeks. But again, I'm foolish so... Anyways! How about a funny story? Ok, it's not funny, it's only embarrassing for me and really it's just little mom-fession for you before we get to the juicy stuff.
Like I said, pregnancy nausea has been the worst this time around and lasting longer than I remember in the past, but I promise that is NOT a complaint because I am not vomiting all the time, and I know that compared to so many I have it way easy, I'm just setting up the story. So I feel sick most of the time, but it's way worse when I don't eat, because SURPRISE! I'm just like every other pregnant woman that ever lived.
Yesterday, I took the girls to their Monday afternoon ballet class, during which I just sit and wait for about an hour-and-a-half total, because Lucy's class is first, then the older girls. Anyways, I'm usually smart enough to grab a snack before I leave because I know my ravenous pregnant self, but this time I was being all productive and forgot.
As soon as we got to the class and I immediately started feeling starved. It had been at least a couple hours since my last snack, and I was staring down 1.5 more before I could find any other food, which in pregnant appetite time is like, 12 million years. I started to panic, drooling at little kids' snack cups wondering if they would noticed if I just grabbed a quick handful of their cheerio and raisin mix. They all seemed really attached to their cups so I resolved to feeling awful and maybe needing to run to the ballet school toilet to vom before we left.
But then the most gloriously awful thing happened.
A little girl's parents gave her a quarter to get some Chewy Sprees from the candy machine, the only source of food in the waiting room (you better believe I had already scoured my wallet for quarters, there were none). So the girl gets her share of candy, which the mother complained about being a rip off because it was only 3 pieces- it was, indeed, a rip off. We laughed and I stared at her Sprees with only the littlest bit of envy.
Then little Joe decided he wanted candy and went over and started banging on the candy machine to try to get some, but I informed him we would not be getting any because of the dearth of quarters in my purse. But THEN! He wiggled the handle juuuust right and out fell 5 more chewy Sprees. Never had any food looked so good in my life, and Joe promptly picked up 2 and shoved them in him mouth. The parents of the little girl noticed that they were probably the remnant of their child's candy, which the machine failed to spit out, but they told their child that she couldn't have them, probably because they were on the dirty floor.
Let it be known, dirty floors mean nothing to the starving pregnant lady-- NOTHING!
I sneakily snatched up the last 3 Sprees without Joseph seeing them, and pretended to throw them away, and then..............
I ate them.
I shoved the dirty Sprees into my starving mouth and ate them. Without shame.
Ok with some shame because I felt the need to sneak it, I mean, I was technically stealing candy from a child, which was on a very dirty floor and eating out of sheer desperation. New lows come when you're least expecting them.
Have I made you wait long enough? Want to know what we're having??