We've been blessed with a wonderfully spirited first born who, for the better part of her life, has awoken no later than 6 and probably for half of her life, has greeted us and her day even earlier.
I almost called this post "Sometimes I want to say the "F" word"but I thought it could cause scandal. But for real, there is little in the world that makes me want to yell expletives more than waking before the clock starts with a 6. I HATE waking up before 6. Strike that, I hate waking up before 8, but I will take 6 and hug and kiss it and give it flowers if I could get it.
Here is what my mental dialogue looks like when I have to wake up during the 5 o'clock hour, like I did this morning (mind you this is only in my head, and I do not condone the usage if this vulgar word):
Naomi is standing next to my bed, in my face, it is still dark out, I look at the clock, 5:10: "F"
She explains she is soaked and needs a new pullup, pants, and a new sheet: "F"
I fulfill all her needs, put her back in bed explaining that it is still "the middle of the night and she needs to go back to bed (lies), I lay back in my bed, the clock now says 5:23: "F"
I roll over at 5:40, I still haven't fallen back asleep. I even toy with the idea of getting up and cleaning and starting my day before the girls, I look at the clock again: "F it, I am just going to lay here"
I start to fall back asleep when I am awoken again by noises, I look at the door and there is light streaming in, there were no lights on before: "F, she's up again"
By this point it is past 6, I go out to find her under the dining room table, I tell her that she needs to lay back in bed until 7, that she hasn't gotten enough sleep so she complies. I go back to bed seriously hoping now that my intense fatigue resulting not only from the stupid early wake time and the fact that I did not go to sleep early enough to make this a good night sleep, but also from the fact that even even if I had gotten 8 hours of sleep and woken up at 7, I would be completely exhausted because I'm pregnant- please don't tell me all the energy will come back w a few weeks. It will not. It never does. I will be exhausted for the next 5 months and then many more after, that is the way this goes. I am not complaining, wait yes I am, but mostly I am just showcasing why many of my mornings are a prescription for bad words in my head. Also, I am not very pious. I mean, if I were, I would offer up these mornings much more readily for people who have real difficulties. I usually try to remember to do that, after I have shouted 27 expletives in my head.
While getting breakfast together and after getting yogurt on my hand "F", and spilling flour all over myself "F", I thought maybe I should put on some rap music in order to get myself motivated to get some stuff done in preparation for our trip, but then I figured that the only reason I even wanted to do that is because of the vocabulary already filling my head and that just maybe Ludacris and Jay-Z would most likely just exacerbate it.
So unless I can find some G rated Kanye, I will likely be listening to my rosary and chaplet on repeat for the rest of the day in reparation for being a terrible person.
*A note to the scandalized reader: the "F" words going through my head have never actually left my head and the letter "F" is often used internally in place of the actual foul word. My children have never heard this word, at least not from me.