Monday, December 3, 2012

Fake it til you make it

Now that I have shared with everyone on the world wide web how things are really going over here, I thought I would share with anyone who cares a few techniques I have come up with to cope with the day to day.

I am surely in NO position to give any advice, so that is absolutely NOT what I am doing. This is more of a reminder for my future self since I can't even remember what I ate for lunch let alone what helped me with the baby transition in a few years when another babe pops out. SO this is for me. And you if you are desperate and willing to take advice from a mediocre mom like me.

I've decided that the best course of action for me is incorporate things into my life that give the illusion that I've got it together, even though I most certainly do not. Also, my expectations are super low, that is also key.

Here are 3 things that have been helping-- wine and coffee are a given every day. And lots of prayer (ejaculatory prayers in my many moments of sleep deprived desperation. I'm being over dramatic. Or am I?)

These all start with the letter S so it's easy to remember: bonus!!

1) Showering. while I do not always-or if I am honest ever- wash my face at night anymore, it has been pretty key for me to shower each morning. I know a whole lot of women that this is not the case for, they just don't need to shower every day. However I seriously NEED to shower every day. If I don't I feel nasty and cranky. And if I do, I at least feel like I have it all together, even though I don't: it's all about illusions.

This is one thing that is worthy of a little video watching in my opinion, all I need is 15 minutes, so a short video works just fine:
I thought this was preferable to a picture of me in the shower. You. are. welcome.

 2) Socializing. I may have mentioned in various posts how I've been getting out of the house with all 3 children fairly frequently. This is because I'm a pretty extroverted person who needs to talk to people or else I start to get anxious and twitchy. If it is too much for me to get out of the house, it always ends up being worth it to call a friend and invite them over. It is also why blogging has not totally stopped for me since it is my other favorite way of socializing, even though it is via the interwebs. It doesn't matter- I love it all and it all helps a lot with early post partum stir-craziness.

And the kids love it too. Yes, they are devouring the sugar cookie creche.

3) Spanx. Maybe you don't own a pair, but they have been my best friend during these early days after having a baby and feeling extra fluffy. I do not wear them every day but I've worn them a lot when going out: to Mass, out with Mike, to some play dates or other social functions.
the only reason I fit into any of this 2 weeks after birthing Lucy

It may seem super vain of me (because it is) but it just helps me feel my best during the days where the baby-having pouch is sticking out extra far. It's nice to not have to feel like I have to suck it in all the time and it helps with fitting in to certain pants, skirts and dresses that would not otherwise fit. I haven't had to wear them as much recently because I am actually fitting into a lot more, but for the first 6 weeks they were my bff.

Obviously there are other, way less vain and way more important, methods of coping, but these are a few that don't necessarily come to mind right away for me. I also tend to get all guilty for feeling like I need these things, but generally they've helped me to feel better about myself and less crushed by intensity that is the newborn time and therefore help me to be a better mom and person. I am always open to other suggestions.

And now here is a completely unrelated video of Bernadette scolding the lobsters and crabs apparently living on our kitchen floor threatening to eat her clementines. Grace, you're not the only one perpetually pealing those stupid things. (It sounds like I am telling Naomi to stop in a mean voice, but rest assured I am just telling Bernadette to yell at the crabs and lobsters.)


  1. Stupid Clementines. Peter killed like 8 yesterday. And I finally just taught him how to peel them himself. And the evidence is all over my breakfast room floor. And has been since Saturday. And it will probably still be there tomorrow. Honesty.

  2. Love these tips! I am a believer in daily showers too..does wonders for my outlook of the day. I need to invest in some Spanx...any recommendations to hold in the post baby blubber?

  3. Buy cuties not clementines! Easier to peel and no seeds!

    Love your tips. In my opinion, anything that makes the Mama feel good makes everyone in the house have a better day. Showering and putting on real clothes (not yoga pants or sweatpants) is a big one for me post-partum.

  4. You. Look. AMAYZING. I still wasn't able to leave the HOUSE two weeks after having Mary, what to speak of wear real clothes and have a baptism! Gorgeous. Fabulous.

  5. There is nothing vain about showering or Spanx! It's amazing how much better you feel about life in general when you feel/look good!

  6. I'm an every morning showerer; I'm an uber crank otherwise. Plus, I have to get off yesterday's mascara somehow!

  7. I didn't wear my usual Spanx in my What I Wore Sunday post & when I looked at the photos, I was slightly horrified by my one year postpartum baby bump. I totally agree about the Spanx & the showering. They are both must have in our house too. And wine, but that's a given, right? You look great, Ana, and you seem to be doing great too! You definitely seem to have it more together than I did when Paul was born.

  8. I second the showering. It is a must! Also, I am a sucker for videos of other people's kids...

  9. Add me to the list of people who MUST shower every day. I also need to put on real clothes (at least for a little bit until they get spit up on).

    Oh, and hi from the ol' blogosphere. :)

  10. llllove these. I'm a little over 14 weeks pregnant with our newest addition, and it's what I hear is the hardest leap: from one child to two. I'll def keep the showering daily in mind when I'm bleary eyed and feeling like a milk truck.